I’ve spent the day at Disney on my own Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride in my rented wheelchair. I could have spent $50 a day on a motorized chair, but I wanted to know what it is like to be so dependent on others to get around. The result? Frustrating. I feel like I’m viewing the [...]
Archive for the ‘Euphemisms’ Category
31 Mar
For those less fortunate
I spied three fortune cookies on top of the microwave at work today. I tore off the plastic wrapper of one, cracked it open and read, “Don’t give in to cynicism.” Seriously? That is my fortune? But what if I like cynicism? Just then, I dropped half the cookie on the floor. Not wanting to [...]
19 Sep
My new penis plant
I picked up a new Penis Plant on my way back from Hawaii. Penis Plant is not the official name, just the name that Physics Goddess and I used to call them when we couldn’t remember what kind of plant it was. Now I know what it is, but kind of like the name I [...]
22 May
Typical Saturday
Two weeks ago, I woke up to what should have been a typical Saturday morning. I was wide awake at 0700 against my own wishes. Regardless, Perl and I went out for our morning constitutional, also known as “walking the dog”. Before we could get to the street, we ran into The Author. She was [...]
10 Dec
I got stigmata from screwing
I bought a table and chair set from Ikea. Screwing was tough because the hole was tight and the screw was wide, so I had to apply extra pressure to get it in deep enough. So I pushed on the screwdriver with the palm of my hand and twisted until a layer or two of [...]
25 Nov
What I’m missing
I finally realized that what I miss the most is flirting. Good old-fashioned flirting. The other day, I went on a date. It happens sometimes. I don’t actually tell you all everthing. This blog is like the iceburg hit by the Titanic—just scratching the surface. So I went out with a guy I met online. [...]
14 May
Cannot reproduce
Regardless of what you all think, this is *not* how I fix my bugs. Thanks, xkcd.
