What is normal?

A while ago, a friend asked me, “How often do you expect to have sex when you are in a relationship?”
“How long has this relationship been?”
“A couple months, and now we’re living together.”
“So how often do you expect to have sex?”
“Well, ideally, once a day.”
“Seriously?” I didn’t really have to ask that because at this point I knew he was. So I tried to make him feel better. “Someone once asked me if it was normal to have sex three to four times a day.”
“Yes. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I asked when she had time to eat.”
“Wow. That is crazy.”
“Yeah, that is what I thought.”
“So what do you think is normal?”
Who made me the arbitrator of normal sex habits? “Once or twice a week?”
“That’s all?”
“And not on school nights?”
“No sex on school nights?”
“Too much stress. Can’t have sex when I’m tired from work.”
“So maybe you two can compromise.”
“I hope so.”
Me too. Poor girl, having to turn him down a couple times a week. Can’t be easy.

What a mismatch between men and women. Women feel like sex is something we have to prepare for. Put on something pretty. Set the mood. Make it into a production. Men act like it is as simple as brushing their teeth. Clothes off and they are ready to go.

So what do you think is normal?


One response to this post.

  1. Posted by Anonymous on November 17, 2007 at 6:00 am

    Well I would say normal for me in that situation (new relationship, move in together thing) was every nite for like a few months then every other nite for a while and if there wasn’t sex then there was other things being done till we got married then it was less frequesnt. Now he works a different shift and things are all screwed up but its normal for us at this moment…but as a female I would LOVE it more than two times a week…But normal is relative I think to each person!!


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