Cats and Dogs

Living together. Creates hilarity.

I was sitting in the middle of the couch. My normal position so that I can have at least two pets leaning against me at any given time. Perl was on my right, curled up, sleeping.

Pablo was on my left. He rubbed up against me and when I didn’t pay attention, he sunk his claws in my arm. You need to understand that his clawed paws come at me in slow motion. I know they are coming, and yet I am paralyzed into thinking he won’t actually do it. But he makes contact every time. Just trying to get my attention. Trying to get me to pet him.

I ignored him.

Usually, he continues to claw me until I threaten to kill him. Or manhandle him. He likes that. Not this time. He walked across the back of the couch to the arm next to Perl.

Then he air rubbed her. I saw him do it. Head tilted, he moved as if he were going to rub up against the dog. He just didn’t have the guts to do it, so he was a foot away when it happened. It was cute. I half expected him to start talking.

And then Pablo went in with the claws.

Perl knew he was there. She was looking at me as if I should do something about it. Get him away. I was being a bad owner by letting the cat attempt to molest her this way.

I saw the claws coming, but I couldn’t stop. It was like watching a train wreck. The cat reached down at half speed and pet the dog’s back. The dog didn’t see it coming. She jumped. I laughed. An evil laugh. A schadenfreude laugh.

Pablo just wanted attention. From me, from the dog, who cares.

Do you think he will learn to play the air guitar next? I could make some money with that!


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