Dear Dr. Alex

I just read your article, Why The Smartest People Have The Toughest Time Dating and I think you have me pegged.

It is true that dating gets a back seat to work. I like to think that if I were in an actual relationship that the previous statement wouldn’t be true, but history proves that wrong.

I also think that I’m entitled to love because of my achievements. I joke that my kitchen remodel is so I can attract a man when really it is just another achievement to prove I can do anything.

However, I believe I do fine at attracting partners. (You did write, “in which case you’re both smart AND pretty and everyone hates you except for me — call me, like, immediately”. Are you single?), and some people even think I have a sense of humor. I’ve even tried to help other geeks out with things like Sex with a Scientist Day and my occasional dating tips.

But I fall for your fourth point in that ‘I am talented at getting in the way of my own romantic success‘ (but really, I’m not sure where he’d been and I really didn’t want to catch anything—std or that expensive pregnancy thing).

And yes, I am down to looking at 1% of the population as a possible dating pool. I can’t lower my standards because I only have one. I need a spark. I don’t care what shape, size, color, or age it comes in, but I need butterflies in my stomach. I’m not looking for “the one”. I met two guys this week who at first glance had potential. I made eye contact, smiled, flirted, did all the things that come natural in attracting a guy that I find attractive. Then I did the ring check.

FAIL.

Is there hope for me?
K

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